I always laugh hearing young children talk about their future dreams. As a kindergartener in Mt. Lebanon, I remember a school project about dream jobs. At the time, things were still very binary. The boys hoped to be firemen or astronauts; the girls ranged from future teachers to hairstylists to doctors and mothers. I always had a flair for dramatics and could only picture myself being a movie actress or pop star.

Reflecting on these exercises can teach us a lot about ourselves. First, it displays the faithful optimism and joy of childhood. Now, with movies like Barbie or Inside Out, kids are taught that their futures are limitless and that no dream is too big. Secondly, as I reckon with the recent death of my teenage years (hello 20,) I also mourn the loss of my unwavering innocence. Since when did I become a champion of practicality and a wearer of “sensible” shoes? Third, how do I get that little girl back without sacrificing the daunting reality of the working world? In other words, how do I forge a meaningful, realistic career that excites me to get up in the morning?

To help narrow the path, I made a list of non-negotiable attributes that my “dream job” should possess:

1. A livable salary

A lot to ask for these days in the realms I am most drawn to, but with rent and gas and other mandatory expenditures, I don’t want to net zero and only afford necessities.

2. Growth opportunities

Many of the paths I’m exploring (journalism, entertainment, PR, consulting) begin with entry-level positions. Some feature a quick progression or require an advanced degree to hit the next level up. As long as those opportunities are available, I am more than willing to bide my time and work from the bottom up.

3. Work-life balance

Work-life balance is sort of a millennial buzzword. To some, it means a full-time hybrid position with unlimited PTO and a raise and bonus every year. Personally, if I’m working a 9-5, Monday through Friday, I would love to leave the bulk of my work in the office. Knowing that I can regularly check emails and be on call for emergencies or busier weeks is one thing, but sacrificing your time for recognition or advancement by coming in on Saturdays is another. If your boss has a life outside of work, you do too.

4. A positive work environment

I’ve witnessed enough of my parents’ conversations and watched enough of The Office to know that a toxic office is soul-sucking. I hope to find dynamic management and equally passionate colleagues who support my professional AND personal development.

Although I consider many of these qualifications to be widely accepted across every profession, I have found – albeit, my experience is limited – jobs that cross off every box rarely exist. I’m struggling to narrow the realm of possibilities and give myself direction. As the job market fluctuates generationally, I find that my parents’ generation yearned for the linear trajectory that I so frequently reject. Even many of my peers, still suffering the long-term trauma and instability from COVID, are opting for careers in STEM, finance, and if they prefer the liberal arts like me, the law. I want to do something innovative that allows me to pivot from one position to another when my creative juices dry up.

For the time being, the answer is still overwhelmingly to go wherever the wind takes me. For my midterm break, I will be spending a few days in Los Angeles learning the ins and outs of the entertainment industry. I plan to put myself out there, say “yes” to everything and dodge the dream job questions for as long as humanly possible. I’ve finally accepted that I don’t know what I want to do yet. I’m going to have a career one day and I’m going to graduate from my university with a degree. But for now, I’m just living in the moment, studying what I love, spending time with the best people in the world and trying to be the best (most hireable version) of myself.^﹡

^﹡If an employer recruiting for summer internships is reading this, take all of that introspection with a grain of salt. You can connect with me at www.linkedin.com/in/tessrein.